|Strollings, Pootlings and Musings|
|Season 7 – Spring 2021|
|Series 7 – Inevitable Changes|
|Thursday 29th April 2021|
|The Dreams of Mirren|
Today was my first stroll since last Sunday, it wasn’t a walk, it was a stroll, a gentle stroll and where best can l find peace for a gentle stroll? That’s right the quiets of the reserve. Today was the first day l felt like l could take a stroll. Suze was with me yesterday, mentally l could walk anywhere, but physically – l could walk nowhere. Twenty rounds with a size 9 baseball bat wildly swinging internally is sufficient to tell you that walking on that stomach would not be a good idea.
This week, l have been forced by my body to take advice from my body … YOU are not well, and unless you wish to be called forever more The Numpty of Sandwich then our advice to you is to take it easy. Ignore Fitbit, ignore your OCD, take a break, your body’ll not instantly turn to flab and weakened muscle mass – be kind to yourself … and as l have aged, l find l listen to my body more.
My body is not like it was when l was twenty, thirty, forty or even fifty … now it is different. My mind, well that’s another matter … my mind is wild and active, and vibrant and colourful and mentally unstable at times in a nice way … but not always. I have dark thoughts – and currently l am training them … but then l have always had a darkened side to me, a warped side, a side that doesn’t always see things the way that some folks might … l am very curious and throughout my life that curiousness has rewarded me as well as gotten me into deep waters and troubles.
I was for many years known as Mr Inappropriate – the man who could be relied upon to swallow his entire foot in improper’ness … curiosity can kill the proverbial cat and nearly kills an awkward Aspie too!
I think the world back then was more forgiving, it wasn’t looking for excuses to fly off the handle at the slightest nudge of oopsy and err. It could apply logic and decide rightly or wrongly if something was said correctly or accidentally … but that world is no longer living on this planet. Now our planet teeters on the edge of an almighty chasm of danger between peoples and countries and cultures and so on … we have to be double careful what we say, what we write and how we come across as individuals.
People want difference, and yet they don’t want a difference that makes them look different unless they were the ones to create that very difference … in the first place, and then they change their minds when others adopt the difference because it means they are no longer ‘that’ different and to copy the difference, might offend them …. of course. I am not saying we should go around upsetting all the apple carts with determined deliberation … but surely logic MUST play a part in comprehensions.
My mind is incredibly active at present and springs from one tangent to another form of abstractivity and back again. I am seeking stimulation to try and calm my mind down and so l find myself immersed in dark gothic literatures, creepy and spooky writing and hundreds of miscellanous topics covering all sorts of things and the more l dive into the unusual, the more darkly my mind absorbs these things and of course … my mind then dreams and creates, and conjures and imagines and when l am unwell like l have been this week, it explodes into strange phenomenas all by itself….
I am still not fully 100% back to my health like l was for my last ‘stroll’, but l am better than l was and that is a good start …It was good to get out for my stroll today, the sun when you were in it was warm, but the shade was cold, l felt it more as l was literally strolling and not walking fast … but it gave me ample time to take the gallery below. Hope you enjoy it.
Gallery – blackbird, pond, wooden bridge full colour and denim, wooden bench, wooden bridge over Delf stream, spring bluebells, posing robin, pink flowers and yellow daffs on water.
Just before l went to bed last night, l read this article about Helen Mirren someone who l happen to admire a great deal … did it affect my night’s sleep?
MM, well maybe, a smidgen …
|The Dreams of Mirren|
This week alone,
I have had some strange ol’ dreams,
… it’s like life has thrown,
Me into the world of the hellish death scene!
Never mind crazed vibrancy and colourful wildness,
… these last few days,
Have seen the birth of a newfound and deathly darkness,
That has left me in the state of betwixt haze!
Weird dreams have absolutely nothing on the madness…
…. That has carelessly swirled around in my head,
On these nights of marish feverishness …
And debauched vividity and shocking dread!
Why, l tell you l will…
…. I went and fell into a deeply dark and dank hole,
That seemingly had no bottom and somehow still,
I managed to crawl right out of that steeply upturned knoll!
Yet, when l emerged, l had a crawling upon me,
… the largest hairiest and foulest ugliest spider,
Anyone has seen, that was just beyond plain creepy,
it crawled up my arm like an insidious serpent from hell,
… but when it got to my elbow,
It changed and suddenly grew a crab like shell,
….. and proceeded to slither and slime real slow,
Towards my downturned face,
…. It cared not for the horrors it did so bring to the surface,
It’s purpose if that is such a thing,
Was to display to me, the burdens of my slumbering furnace,
…. My mind caught up in a state of continued blurring!
But the moment that thing from the very pits of the decaying beneath,
… was a mere snatch away from my face,
It turned into a hideous warted toad with bloodstained teeth…
…and quickened its pace,
And leapt into my wide open and screaming mouth,
…. And shot down my throat to the base of my insides,
But it didn’t stop, it simply carried on south,
… dangerously and painfully boring my organs into bloody divides!
I know not what happened at that point,
…. Because what l next remember is having my head slewn,
From my shoulders by a gorgeous assassin,
Draped only in silken finery s and golden balloons …
… really? I asked myself at the recollection,
Of the night afore the morning after,
Waking up groggy as if l had a wild orgasmic night on the tiles,
Drunken and splayed, doped up by weed and laughter!
With my drawers around my feet and my face filled with grisly smiles!
But still, l wasn’t fully awake even at the thought,
Of whether my scantily attired killer,
Was indeed wearing air fillings or in fact nought!
But more concerned with an oddity that was even more familiar!
That in my dream, this orgy of unexpected unnaturality,
… what was more haunting, than being internally eaten alive,
By a crab like shelled and warty monstrosity,
Was that l had been decapitated and therefore deprived,
Of my very existence by a vamp and a dame to boot!
… a seductress of esteemed voluptuousness,
A true diva of the big screen, a mixture of saucy and cute,
….. and yet, despite all of that and none the less,
The reality of a night filled with death, decay, and decomposition,
… the one thing that baffles me the most,
Was that my killer was none other than Helen Mirren…
…. the Red assassin and the enchantress of Excalibur had made me toast!
Bizarre or what?
© Rory Matier 2021