Morning Musings

Morning Musings Directory
Season 5 – Winter 2020
Series 5– Starting Anew
Monday 11th January 2021 – Walk Time 98Mins
You Who Said Ewe – Ewe Who Said I Too!!?

I decided to walk the same walk yesterday today without the additional Ramparts walk, and see how many steps it was and how long it would take me? The answers are just over 90 minutes and 12,100 steps. So not that long really in either steps or time ……….. it was a good walk this morning, but it had its moments of danger to.

Now pending how long you have been following my blog, you may be aware that l have a small problem with cows … it’s not a fear, but maybe it is … l have worked with all sorts of animals over the years and yet one day on the Isle of Wight in 2015. Scrappy and Suze and l, encountered a herd of cows in a field – well truth be known, l had two experiences with cows and neither worked out too well and all in the Isle of Wight – although admittedly l don’t tend to walk in fields with cows today. If you are not aware of those stories you can find one here…. K9 Adventures [19] – Cows From The Outer Space!!

I am aware of Pigs especially rampant boars – the last thing you need is to be chased by a boar guarding his field of sows, l have made that mistake also with Albert in 1997! That story is here … A Right Pig’s Ear! 1997

“Ah sheep, so placid, so friendly, so peaceful …

But l had never had a problem with sheep … until today, this morning …. in a field not too far away … l met the equivalent to Mad Molly or Dolly or even Polly, it mattered not … it was no folly and by golly l mean it!! On the map above that X is where the ”’incident” happened!! When l found myself in the blink of an eye surrounded by sheep and four of them were not looking human friendly!!

…. “Oh my grief , is she charging me??? Are they following?? Are those bloody sheep looking to attack me on this public footpath?? Whhhy me, why is it always meeeeeeeeeeeeee!!?”
The Scene 12 feet behind me …. one minute it was clear the next half a dozen sheep were walling me in!!?

Molly, Polly, Dolly whatever, ewever or who ever was charging towards me as fast as her little legs could carry her and when she got to within 4 feet of me, snorted and puffed and stamped her front hoofs on the ground! The following was the scene itself in verbal terms ..

“Erm , hello sheep, is it sheep, Mrs Sheep, Madam Sheep or just Ewe Sheep?” I said backing away –
Stamp, stamp, snort, puff, huff, puff, snort stamp stamp and charged forward by a foot and then stamp, stamp , snort and more snorts and seriously eyeballing me!

Oooh dear, l thought this is getting serious, especially as l had Madam Dolly in front of me stamping, another Madam Polly to my left eyeballing me and to my immediate right, two tag along ewes who thought a rumble might be in order, with seven sheep behind me pretending to not be listening in … it was so serious l unplugged my music!

“Look Ewe, l am on the public footpath that yes l do concede runs through your field, but l am on the path, you are now on the path, do you see me in your field?!” Madam sheep unimpressed by this, charged forwards another foot, stamped like a two year old tantrum and snorted!! She is now five feet away from me. “Right, now listen, l am not going to be intimidated by a sheep of all things, you are not going to and excuse my pun here madam, but pull the wool over my eyes!” At this point in time, both of my hands are palm forwards and in front of me. I was met with a sheep who was stomping up and down on her two front hoofs and snorting and puffing and now her mates are starting to edge in towards my ever decreasing circle of freedom and flight.

I suddenly thought … Fuck! I am going to have to run, how can l run from a sheep, not just one, but nearly a dozen .. will the rest of the herd trample me to death? Do people get trampled to death by sheep – why is this always me?? If not cows and pigs now bloody sheep? Am l just a walking target for all British livestock herds or something? Can l run? Mm, it’s bumpy ground, push come to shove l can run, but could l get over that barbed wire fence in a single leap?? Will l be able to outrun a flock of marrauding sheep? How far is the next kissing gate? Gees that has got to be 100 feet away. The fence is four feet high and topped with barbed wire ….. NO!!! I am not being tampered with by a woolly jumper!!

I shook myself free of my thoughts and looked at the sheep “Bugger off Madam Ewe go and play with the other sheep, l mean you no harm and l come in peace, now sod offski!” With that l raised my hands up again, she snorted, stamped once more and then walked off puffing. The other three looked at me dare l say ‘sheepishly’ and then scampered off to their bully friend!

The incident lasted about three minutes and l will not lie … l think my stomach just folded in on itself!! My heart was fluttering as l quickened my pace and headed for the gate, continually looking behind me – but l was safe, they were walking off into the next field having had their fun with the silly human for the day!!

The mini herd scampering off after their “Let’s scare the human moment!!” I can imagine later on when in their night time paddock that Ewe will be sharing her moments of achievement over people like me!! Oh they’ll laugh, eat some more cud, settle down and prepare to launch fresh attacks tomorrow – but l will be ready next time!!

After that the walk was fairly straight forward, the only livestock l encountered were a small community paddling raft of ducks and mallards on the stream heading back through the other side of the Haven Walk and just as l got to the end, l encountered this little darling displaying to me her/his acrobatic skills. I was literally just below as she/he nibbled on the berries with a delightful chuntering.

I am planning on walking this route for most of this week so l can build up my stamina for it …. when l got back l started reading up on Sheep … you may find the following link funny.

How to Survive a Sheep Attack

Anyway, thanks for reading, catch you again.

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16 thoughts on “Morning Musings

  1. It’s likely that people have taken treats to the field, and sheep like treats. And at least there wasn’t a ram protecting his ladies.
    If in a crowd of sheep, a loud clap will move them back. Usually (I think rams consider this a call to battle).

    1. Thanks for the advice Cage, thankfully l don’t think there is a ram in the field, and if there was l think they have to have a sign up, but that’s no guarantee.

      A loud clap, good to know – cheers 🙂

      If it happens again, l will let you know the score.

  2. Sheesh! You *DO* seem to be an animal target, JB! It’s really unfair considering your love of animals. Maybe they were offended by your choice of music 🤔 What were you listening to?🤨😂

    I’m glad the squizzle had the berries and didn’t decide your ears or nose looked tasty😂😂
    Perhaps you might consider a walking staff. A nice burly one.

    🌊🦄💫🧸💌

  3. Brilliant, bloody brilliant! You never fail to make me laugh, albeit at you 😂 i think its safe to say that you shouldn’t ever be a farmer!

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