A Timer To Set Up The Heat?
This afternoon, whilst taking a few minutes for lunch l was watching an episode of Loose Women and an interesting topic came up which was Setting an established time to have arguments. Well this aroused my curiosity and fascination at the same time, so l thought let’s pose it to the readership. What do they think?
It principally works to the tune of instead of just exploding at the time of an incident to each other, you should hold off, buy yourselves a timer and then schedule a time when you have the arguments. So it might be suggested as an example that next Sunday we are all going to set the timer for 1, 2, 5 or 10 minutes just to argue between ourselves.
Once the Timer is set and the first person to vent off has finished, the other person can then opt to respond or NOT respond at all. During the Timer period, the arguer is the only one to speak, and the listener is to be 100% quiet and not butt in or counter argue when the arguer is venting. If the listener decides to NOT respond, then nothing else can be said throughout the day with regards the vented topic.
I found this interesting as well as a little bit silly – l mean l can understand if this was about ‘Discussion’ and setting up an established time to discuss something. But most arguments and conflicts are a spontaneous combustion moment – so l cannot see how if something happened on a Monday and the established period to counter argue and argue was the following Sunday – how would that work effectively without bitterness and resentments from developing during the days leading to the official day?
Suze and l when together as a couple never argued, we both hate conflict with a passion. My ex wife and l argued constantly .. l should rephrase, she argued a lot – she loved arguments and l could never see her agreeing to wait X amount of days to argue. But then she was aggressive to boot, l wasn’t .. but in the end to avoid arguments and aggressions – l just stopped caring.
I text Suze about this question and asked her opinion and it was this …
We don’t argue
I think scheduling time for arguing is ridiculous as arguments usually happen as a result of something!
I agree with Suze, l don’t like arguments, l prefer discussion – but l also know my limits and boundaries and arguments with the wrong person can make me seriously explode because l do have quite a volatile temper, so l tend to walk away from conflicts more, which is what l would try to do with my ex-wife – sometimes that worked, many a time it did not and when it didn’t she would become aggressive.
So to the question ….
What are your thoughts on Setting an established time to have arguments?
Let me know below – thanks.