Season 5 – 541 –
Journal Memories …….
2nd August 2012 ………..
I have made a list of my life in the caravan …. and what l have to move.
| 1 6″ Mattress having sold expensive bed frame in 2009 due to it not being able to fit into caravan bedroom. 1 Computer Desk and Computer. 1 Broken Television set and DVD player. 1 mangled kettle, battered microwave and toaster. Box of assorted crockery and cutlery. 900 DVD’s and 300 Books Jumble styled clothing heap of once proud wardrobe due to damp caravan. Box of assorted bits, charity shops would gladly throw into the dumpster! Two dogs and one ragged and battered human. |
Time it took to pack up and move my life away from the caravan – 3 hours ……… what?? 3 Hours – how is it my life is now only 3 hours long?? That’s got to change!
3rd August 2012 ………..
Crikey, as it all starts to sink in – one finds themselves pondering on making a home again. The last nearly four years here were ideal for many reasons and only in the last 20 or so months did it become very painful to dwell here. But here, l finally rediscovered my identity – not an easy task l tell you. But yes, once l leave here, l will be now making a home that is owned by the me of today and ironically despite knowing who l am now – l have not got a foggiest what a real home truly is. That will be a challenge indeed.
3rd August 2020 ………..
Dang, but there is an eerie spookiness to this memory – here l am 8 years to the day in a very similar position to 8 years ago – and guess what? Well 1, I am still slightly vague about how to actually make a home and 2 l am in the process of reidentifying with me again … maybe this time l’ll be luckier for the next 8 years!
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“So, I guess we are who we are for a lot of reasons. And maybe we’ll never know most of them. But even if we don’t have the power to choose where we come from, we can still choose where we go from there. We can still do things. And we can try to feel okay about them.”
Steven Chbosky
I feel that life is an ongoing adventure. Maybe feeling too comfortable in our nook is not how we are supposed to live.
You know what Sadje ………. l actually completely 100% agree with you l am beginning to think that way totally 🙂
Life teaches us not to be complacent. A jolt here and there to keep us on our feet.
Very much so, unless of course it is so potent it knocks you flat 🙂 But getting up again proves you are still breathing 🙂
Yes exactly! I think that the challenges we face in life mostly lie in the range that we can deal with.
Very true.
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Making a home depends on what that is to you. Is subjective technically.
A place you find peace maybe? A place you can escape from the outside world? A place with family or friends? Or even solitary peace. Where you are loved and comforted, or where you love, or where you feel safe?
It’s whatever you want it to be, or in some cases what you allow it to be.
You seem to do pretty well.
Very valid points Trisha, l suspected that was it – l just think l never sat down and gave it proper thought 🙂
You’ve already started… your Livin Den is the heart… I can see it from the photos. The rest will arrange itself a piece at a time… over time.
I think making a “home” is more about you and the vibes you put out than the actual building (unless there’s “other stuff” with the building). If you are at peace and comfortable in yourself, your spaces will reflect that, encourage it.
If you’re upset, chaotic… your spaces will reflect that too.
Blah, blah, blah… 🙄😆🧸💌
Very True 🙂
The Liven Den is the very hub of me as long as that is functioning, l function 🙂
My home is getting lighter as I let go of more and more things. Who I am now is not who I was when I moved in so many ears ago.
Oh yes, l can relate to that also 🙂
As time passes more stuff breaks or just disappears. Don’t replace automatically but somehow the free space still shrinks. Cluttered house reflects my cluttered mind. I guess home is anywhere by aching body can get comfortable in.
Very true home is where the comfort is 🙂