Day 21 of Moving Madness!
The Days After …… 3#
Slightly changed from the 17th but principally the same – life’s about priorities of your friends whoever they may be!
I am looking forwards to either the 31st July or maybe the 29th – the former being the fixed termination of contract and key return for Hillyfields [the house in Kingsdown] whilst the latter might be an earlier termination of the contract on account of the deep clean being done and the carpets being cleaned on the 28th. I loved that house, l have some truly great memories there and more so with Scrappy – but equally some much sadder ones with Scrappy including her passing in January and of course l will never forget her K9 Dementia.
Scrappy’s dementia, meant that Suze and l lost our little girl twice – l watched my best friend slip away mentally long before l watched her slip away physically in January. They say being there in the last moments of your dogs life you will have the chance to say goodbye and they to you. Sadly however, that wasn’t true for us or her. Scrappy in the closing months of her life didn’t recognise us anymore and that really hurt me, us both deep.
In the last car journey Scrappy ever took which was January 12th this year, for a dog who so loved the car and travelling she was completely unawares to what a car was even all about and as l sat next to her that day, 27 weeks ago last Sunday – l knew it was my last time with her.
Scrappy had been in my life since March 2004, we aged her to have been born around November 2003 and because she had found me and we rescued each other l awarded her Dora’s birthdate of 30th November 2003. Scrappy may have of course been slightly younger or even marginally older than l believed her to be, but l will never know. What l will know is that l had her friendship and companionship in my life for nearly 16 years, but she was over 16 when she went away.
I met Suzanne in real time [we had been friends since January 2013] June 22nd 2013 and in turn she met Scrappy and Dora [RIP 24th March 2014] who were my two girls and my two best friends. So Scrappy and Suzanne as a couple had been together for nearly 7 years when she passed.
The hardest thing is when you cannot say goodbye to one of your best friends – l was able to say goodbye to Dora who died in my lap, but Scrappy was oblivious to our presence that Sunday. I do plan to write a series on Scrappy and her life but just writing this and it has upset me terribly ………….. it’s always the days after that are the hardest until they simply aren’t.
It’s been harder moving this time around not because of the emotions of Suze and l, because how l may write or how some perceive me to be … l am not deeply upset by my status – l am upset at the nature of the departure and certain elements that l haven’t discussed yet. But as a deep thinker – l tend to give some things very deep thought. Suze and l is a topic of deep thought, but not depression or ‘oh my God l am so lonely!!’ moments or those of despair – we are what we are now and who we are. No, it was harder as a move without my dogs.
Truth is, l miss my dogs more than l miss anyone else and now they are both gone … that is what l have felt the hardest blows from. Suzanne isn’t out of my life, we are friends and l still see her, we are after all only 8 miles apart – whereas Scrappy and Dora and l are forever apart – that was really hard. I am more dog orientated than human, and my dogs were more human orientated than dog and that is why this move and all the movements of this year so far has been really hard and hurtful and not for any human emotions.
Thursday 16th [Night Time] Setting up the desk ready for the furnishings arrival the next day – in this gallery again all about priorities and friends.
This is my ‘Living Office’ over the next few months this room will see the greatest of changes which you will read about in The Blokes New Digs.
It’s time for me to start moving on into a new journey, a new lifestyle, a new me and a new personable identity and it is all new because never before now, have l been aged 57 and single and living as a lone bachelor – so you ask yourself – who are you if not that or them or they? The house in Sandwich and l have a lot of trekking to perform together in order for us to come to understand us and develop an understanding of the other. I plan to write about this in greater detail in another series …… However for now, let’s just look at The Day After shall we.
On the 17th July, my life which had been slowly seeping in to this building since the 6th, arrived in finality in so far as furnishings – the plants themselves – like Ava, are not due to arrive until the 22nd, tomorrow. Then the rest of the garden will come here.
But the truth is, l didn’t really have a lot of life to move – which is why the new series The Blokes New Digs is really going to be a different look at me, personality wise. Describing me in a few words – well l will answer that in another post and ask you all at the same time ‘who you really are?’ as opposed to who others think you might be.
There are many changes starting from next month ………… like and including something you have seen before, below: This too!
Thanks for reading, catch you later in part #4– The Last Day!