Strangely Strange Stranger Confidentiality?

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Strangely Strange Stranger Confidentiality?

You know you never think how odd some words look until you have several variations in front of you … like above. I saw this and thought mm, l never thought how ‘strange’ the word looked until l saw lots of them together!! So l looked it up …

The adjective strange comes from Latin word extraneus, meaning “foreign” or “external.” If someone approaches you speaking with a strange accent, it means you can’t identify where the person is from, not that he or she is odd or weird — the newer meaning of strange.


The other day in a ‘Well You Prompted Me’ – l responded to Melanie of Sparks from a combustible mind and her SYW series with this ... Share Your World – Omnibus Edition and two of the questions were very similar to each other in roundabout ways …

What’s something your family would be surprised to learn about you?

What is the darkest thought you’ve ever had? What about the darkest thing you’ve done that you’ve never told anybody about?

Interesting questions -which l have noticed over the years that when ‘personal relateable content’ questions are asked a lot of people tune in to the responses with almost baited breath…

I recently saw the Netflix series “The Stranger” which is principally a tale about how secrets are let out of the bag by someone who shouldn’t know, but does and uses it to their advantage…. even with twists to their hidden goal!

It was a darkly strange series and l think quite the reflection on today’s world … it was almost deliciously taboo if you follow my drift and travel to the darkened corners of your curious minds. It is like a form of information and data voyeurism … that has been present in humankind since the very dawn of cognitive social media popularity.

Also l recently read an article about how we as people at times turn to complete strangers with our secrets and problems, and find it easier to tell them about our woes than we find it to tell our loved ones … which was kind of interesting really … because that is true isn’t it?

Of course, many would answer that small question with a resounding NO! That’s not true it’s absurd to suggest such a thing .. l don’t do that!!!

I gave this a lot of thought and then started to try and work out the definition based upon my blog – my reality blog is about my life past and present and within, l in stories or tales,  topical posts or journal entries tell the world about 95% of my life – some of my readership l know, some l have a friendship with – but how many of you have l met?

None, so in essence you, l, me and we are all strangers … aren’t we?

Many of my friends are virtual friends and of course how does friendship start? By communicating and conversing with each other and slowly as that friendship develops – more trust begins to develop and then gradually the friendship blossoms  – and irrelevant to whether it is in the physical presence or virtual – the friendship is sound.

But l still came back to the question that the article was basically about, which was why we feel at times more compliant in talking to strangers about our lives than we do with our families, companions and close friends and loved ones?

Someone said we do this because there are no consequences? Is that true? Are there no consequences by talking to strangers? I guess it comes down to the information shared with the stranger. In today’s digital world with the likes of social media like Facebook and Twitter and to a certain degree blogs too – people share their everyday lives and not just that – but sometimes more.

Sure l write freely and without hesitation, but still l only award you 95% and occasionally slightly higher – but that 95% is on my life in the world living life and a lot of that is in my past … some of course talks about now and future plans – but l don’t award people that inner sanctum of my identity – because it is no one’s business but my own.

So then l thought okay, so maybe it’s not the information so much, but maybe who you tell and more importantly what they think of you with regards what you tell them? Friends and family might judge you, whereas someone who does not know you probably will not …. probably, right? But then we get back to the information awarded to a stranger?

Is that just a woe, a concern, an observation, a comment or a confidence? A secret? There is a lot of money in secrets – you only have to watch The Stranger to see that plot play out.


Then l thought … well wait a minute?? Is it not so much about the information maybe but the way it is delivered and maybe it’s not about strangers per se, but about friends and family? What defines them … in the world today?  If we can trust our loved ones our companions, can we really  trust our friends and family enough with incidental confidences?

If we have a concern – do we need to NOT voice it first and foremost to ourselves to see how it sounds and then do we not begin to look for confirmations of information – like we Google or surf for answers before we talk to people, right?

Plus what happens if you don’t have many close friends, or meet and engage with lots of people on a daily basis and really all you have is acquaintances and colleagues and …. strangers to the normal friends, family and loved ones – what then? Are they strangers still or do you have to seek more strangers to your existing strangers?

Perhaps it is just easier to talk to strangers as in, those we do not know ‘well’ as opposed to those we do know ‘very well’ to trial how things sound to not cause upset to those we love and care about …. ?

But sometimes – it is just easier to talk without complications, agendas and complexity to strangers than it might be with family, friends and loved ones … you know?

You can see, l am sure how a conversation like this has so many twists and turns and possibilities of further and deeper discussion – however this a 24 Hour Blog Question – so what is the main question or what are the questions then?

Who are you closest to that you can entrust your deepest concerns with?

How likely are you to discuss a confidence with someone other than a friend, a loved one, a companion or indeed family?

Who are you likely to talk to – stranger wise – when you need to tell someone – ‘something?’

If you were to confide in a stranger – what would be the reason to do so?

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20 thoughts on “Strangely Strange Stranger Confidentiality?

  1. I don’t know. I’m always conscious of what I’m saying and to whom. Maybe I’m different because I’ve made (a few) mistakes in blogging and read the horror stories about getting fired. There are people who talk about work on their blogs ~ you’ll note that I never do that. I don’t mention coworkers at all, or clients. I’m also very careful when I mention friends/family because I don’t want anyone getting pissed off at me. I try to be as vague as possible when writing about any experience that involves another person, though even then people have popped up and said hey. You just don’t know who’s reading. They aren’t all strangers, lol.

    1. Very true Paula, they are not ‘all’ strangers 🙂

      Strangely enough, as l was creating this post l was thinking about you and the experiences you have made mention to in the last few weeks 🙂

      1. I change the names in all my dating stories but even so one dude knew I meant him. Luckily, it was someone I wasn’t mean “mean” to 🤣

  2. When sharing things with family or friends, they’re close enough to the situation that they’re not just reacting to what you’ve told them, but also reacting to the way they think it’s likely to affect them and situating it within the context of everything else they know about you.

    Sharing things with a stranger is simple because there isn’t all that closeness baggage attached.

  3. I talk to my husband about everything, including my concerns and complaints about my kids and other family members. With strangers, I can share a passing worry weighing on my mind but not my deep thoughts. With my friends, in real and on my blog I share whatever is not concerning my family. I find it really helps to unburden my mind and heart to bring it out in the open and talk about it.

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