Don’t beat yourself up about it .. ?

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Don’t beat yourself up about it .. ?

Do you think that we are ourselves our biggest enemies at times? That no one can do more damage to us, than us  or we and we, or even you and you, me and me! That we are the biggest bane to our own existence at times?

Have you ever sat down and thought about this? How much you bully yourself? How much you put yourself down and so on … have you ever thought about that?

Sometimes l receive compliments from people and they astound me because l think – ‘who are you referring to? Because that’s not me! You shouldn’t be complimenting me because l am terrible! I can not do anything right, so l am not worthy of your praise!

Many a time l am guilty as hell for negatively smacking myself up – you know? Putting myself down, berating my abilities and so on … that If l was to EVER do this to another living person l could be arrested for verbal assault! It’s not nice stuff we use against ourselves when we are bullying ourselves you know. I call myself all the names under the sun and worse! I turn myself inside out at times in the moment when l am telling myself off so badly that l wonder how l get out of bed some days as l am that bad as a person??

There are many reasons why we do this to ourselves – l have done it to myself many times, but l have to take it on the chin and then get on with it …. right?? Or is that wrong? In so far as l shouldn’t be doing that to myself anyway and that l am a ‘good person’ who is worthy of all the praise l receive?

We usually do this to ourselves  because in our past history we have failed, or been referred to as a failure, and it has scarred us to a certain degree, it routinalises the negativity and makes it alright for us to process despite the knowledge that it is wrong. We know we are bullying ourselves and we tell ourselves to stop … and yet we still perform this and actions like them?

In the last year, l have been working on myself on all sorts of platforms, phases and levels to break the habit of negative bitch slapping my own arse! It’s not easy. My father, mother, parents combined, siblings and the list is quite long from my long ago yesterday years of people who have bruised me along the way to my short ago yesterdays to as little at five years ago who felt nothing at belittling and berating my ability to live life or just be me!

None of US most assuredly should bully ourselves, life is just way too short for that crap and bullshit! We are all guilty, all of us, even those who say they don’t do it to themselves – because they do – we all do! The simpler fact is we all need to learn the ability of ‘self love’ and rid ourselves of the negativity of ‘self hate’.

So simply put as a question, as this is a topic all by itself, and will be discussed in more details soon enough …


Are you guilty of being your own bully and if so, what do you beat yourself up over and about? Additionally, what do you do to promote your own self love?

Let me know below in the comments section, but also let me know if you might like to take part in a guest writer capacity for a new series l have planned in for later this year on a host of topical subjects.

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23 thoughts on “Don’t beat yourself up about it .. ?

  1. Sometimes, but it’s realistic. Forex, it’s a fact that at my age with my array of traits the odds are extremely low I’ll find a romantic match to make me happy. The odds are high I’ll continue to find men who lie to me and annoy me if I keep looking. So, I’ve stopped. But if I tell myself some fake positive bs about how “great” I am and I should keep going, I’ll end up meeting more liars and jerks. That will invite negativity into my life and make me depressed. How do I know? Because I already did that! Now I prefer reality. 🙂

  2. Yes ..i realised that when someone complimented me that i had lost weight and instead of being happy and thanking her i kept on,its just the dress😄…I bully myself for all the things I had planned to do and didnt and then light a cig to get rid of the feeling…

  3. Oh yeah! Definitely my own worst enemy! I have set such ridiculous expectations on myself that of course I fail to achieve them and then I’m the biggest loser on the face of the Earth!

    Its baggage from never feeling good enough in my childhood, then reinforced in my marriage. I know its crap and I’m working on not dragging it around anymore.

    I KNOW that I’m a kind, generous person worthy of good things, but I dont always FEEL that way.

    1. Hey Angie, l know how you feel – l have been brutalising myself most of today, nearly deleted the blog four times and walked away for good – l struggle at times to keep my mojo alive and when it’s low it is always as a result of me beating myself up.

      1. We put too much pressure on ourselves! I’m sure it’s worse for you with your Aspie brain wanting things very ordered.
        I try to tell myself to treat myself like I would a friend. I would never be as hard on a friend as I can be on myself.
        Be a friend to yourself. Tell the ghosts of Halloweens past to shut the f@<k up!!

          1. That’s the only thing that has ever gotten through to me…telling myself to be a friend to myself. I also say to myself ” why are you so special that you should be able to do more? Why are you superhuman?”
            Kinda switch the beating to shaming, but in a kind of positive way. I’m know you get what I mean…

              1. It’s a tricksy day! Halloween and Mercury going retrograde again. Plus, people are just nuts, the collective unconscious is buzzy. I’ve had a headache for days…
                I’ve been trying to rest but then I want to chat with my friends on WP too, then there’s life and Ben…
                We’re human, we do the best we can.

              2. It’s very possible. Mercury went retro today. Happy Halloween, here’s a trick for you😝
                Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to find the treat within the trick. 😉🤔

  4. Aww ya, and having depression doesn’t help anything eather when my mood just flip’s for no reason it’s all becomes negetive or when crappy things happen it all just turns negative, like a nice sunny day instantly becoming a sever tropical storm.


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