Working On Us – Week 19 – Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD)

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Working On Us – Week 19 –

Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD)

Beckie’s Mental Mess Weekly Prompt

Guidelines

Write your own post and create a pingback to the original post here.

There are no right or wrong answers.  Write in any format you see fit.  (Answer’s, fiction, non-fiction, poetry, poem, short prose…anything).

You can do one or all prompts.

You have from October 16th. through October 22nd.  to submit your entries.

Please reblog the original post in order to spread more awareness.

( If you the blogger have a suggestion/question you want to ask in the future weeks, please submit them in the comment section of this post).

Let’s see if we can get some men involved in this week’s prompts, your viewpoint/feelings are validated here too!

Plus, as an added bonus, whoever responds to the following prompts will automatically be reblogged to promote your blog site!

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Prompt

As I did last week, I am requesting bloggers to write a narrative by explaining how this disorder has affected your lifestyle and overall well-being.  I also request that you include the treatment (if any) you received as well as medications you may or may not take.  

Disclaimer – The terminology l use is pre ‘official’ ADHD terminology as in it wasn’t called that when l was a kid! Also, should l use terms in my narrative that you do not like … TOUGH. The terms were used on me when l was a child by my parents, my teachers and my peers.

Despite the fact that as a youngster l was not a bad person, you couldn’t tell my parents that, or my teachers or my friends … l was in their eyes a handful, l was rude, inappropriate and awkward, asocial, untidy in lesson, distractional, stupid and retarded. Now when l was a youngster we are going back to the times at just after dinosaurs walked the …. classrooms! The 60’s, 70’s and the 80’s.

In the 80’s the term ‘retarded’ was not being used against me like it had been in the 70’s by Australian ‘teachers and my father’, although so called friends would use the term ‘spastic’. In the 80’s in England having moved from Australia l was considered an intelligent form of mentally slow. In the 60’s as in late sixties in Malaysia ‘ the lights were on but no one was home, perhaps a little backward?’ Wrote one teacher who is probably long dead by now. My father referred to me as the useless fuckwit in the later 80’s early 90’s.

My timeline as a person is different to the official timeline of the term ADHD which whilst it was around from the early 1900’s it wasn’t really coming into its own until the 80’s. Prior to that it was mostly to do with focus and the hyperactivity element wasn’t even considered  – it went from being called hyperkinetic impulse disorder to attention deficit disorder aka ADD – once that was secured it was then either ADD with hyperactivity or ADD without hyperactivity.

But that’s all gobblygook because in Australia in the 70’s, l distinctly remember a doctor’s appointment in Springvale South [Victoria] at the age of 10 [1973] being ‘diagnosed’ as troublesome and hyperactive and to sort me out a ‘good whallop’ was in order! Well neither my parents and especially my father was offended by that … not that he would tell anyone that a whallop from him could launch you across the other side of the room and potentially render you unable to sit on your arse for a few days! He probably just didn’t like being told that smacking was okay!

In the 70’s l was simply medically classed as ‘hyperactive’ and in need of sterner disciplining!  Would love to see a doctor get away with that kind of talk these days!!

However, what no one saw because they weren’t looking in the later 60’s, all the way through the 70’s, the 80’s and indeed the early 90’s not that they really mattered as l was no longer living at home … was that l actually had Asperger’s syndrome and a lot of my problems were not retardation, stupidity, imbecility, awkwardness and a host of other pleasantries but merely autism. The symptoms of autism and ADHD overlap and most of us can relate to the sufferers of ADHD for difficulty settling, having over stimulated minds, inappropriateness, socially awkward, clumsy, inattentive and furthermore ADHD and Asperger’s syndrome actually share a good 65/75% of common relatability.

As a child, l wasn’t rude, or awkward but shy and reserved, l was curious and mostly ahead of my class and so l switched off to the learning most days and then switched into another world, where l created a different life.

I was being brought up in a 100% dysfunctional and constantly shattered home front by a father who was [l now strongly know/believe] on the spectrum himself,  alongside a neurotic bipolar mother and a troublesome sister who had manipulation issues. It was easier to blame the son who was exploring all avenues of learning but perhaps not the way most kids discovered things. My problem was that l was ahead of my time thinking wise, learning wise … l did things differently. I wasn’t naughty, BUT my father wanted a quiet life and l was nearing the age of no control for him, it was much easier to side with teachers and assume the position of curiosity needs to be dealt with sternly – kill creativity, kill imagination. As l was NOT like the other children, l had to have mental retardation and learning disabilities!

YET l did well in my classes but stumbled in exams. The problems were that in the years mentioned, children of my age, adults today were all receiving this kind of referencing – children still have it hard today, but way easier than when l was growing up  … just!

I outgrew the seriousness side of if you wish the common ADHD relatability by the time l got to my late teens it was already much calmer – l personally believe it dilutes down as you get older and displays itself differently with Asperger’s such as hyperfocus, stimulation and stimming all of which l have now. In my mid twenties to my early thirties l was addicted to sex and l think that there were most assuredly elements of the old’ ‘hyperactivity’ present then.

I never received medication because l was only diagnosed as hyperactive and not officially as ADHD. I am not receiving any medication for any of my current diagnosis’s as in Asperger’s or Bipolar.brain-954822_960_720

18 thoughts on “Working On Us – Week 19 – Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD)

  1. Things definitely have changed now. At least people and doctors cannot use that sort of language now. Though help for kids with these conditions is still scarce.

      1. I know from what I read at your blog that in schools no significant changes have taken place except in using better terminology.

  2. Rory, I know we have in the past discussed how our father’s treated us poorly due to their own issues that were pushed on us at an early age. As the old saying goes, “If I only knew then what I know now.” falls perfectly in time with your post.
    When you speak of the name calling, the doctors and teachers, and all that took place throughout your life, I can’t help but feel heartache knowing these things happened to you because you are such a lovely person.
    However, when you share all this with us… I do sense that you are still extremely angry with all parties involved back then. Have you made peace with this? I mean de to professionals back then not knowing the real issues of Aspergers/ADHD and/or ADD.
    From someone that only knows you for the person you are now, this day, in the present… I think you’ve come a damn long way. I applaud you, really.
    Again, the family dysfunction added to the problems could not have been easy. I know, I had that too. The name calling, the emotional/mental abuse and at times physical.
    Rory, I am so appreciative for you sharing your story and experience with all of us. Thank you so very much for participating this week #19 on “Working on Us.”

    1. Hey Beckie – believe it or not l am at peace with it – but you don’t forget ever – you just learn to accept that was the way it was back then – that was life back then. It is NOT that way now – well language terming wise anyway 🙂

  3. I won’t get too involved but interesting on how I just stated this as part of one of my flaws in my latest post—Flawesome Award. I have been teaching kids with ADHD among various other (dis)abilities for two decades. I teach them that it is a super power and they just need to learn how to focus their energy. People with ADHD have super brains! Unfortunately, at least in America, children are medicated because no one has the patience to allow them to discover how to cope with their ADHD on their own terms.

  4. Ben has both ASD & ADHD as diagnosis. I hope, like you, he is able to channel the hyperactive as he gets older.
    We were resistant to medication for a long time, but without meds he doesnt sleep. At 4 years old he would be awake 20 hours, and unable to settle down.
    Even with meds he sometimes has sleep problems and days when he’ll try to do something and he gets up and paces and tries to settle and gets up and paces…
    He’s on some heavy medication and every time a new doctor goes over his meds they are shocked that he isn’t passed out all day and night. Ha! Far from it.

    1. Hey Grandma,

      I personally [for me] don’t like meds however, in many cases they are needed and more so with the comorbidity aspect of ASD/ADHD – everyone is different and everyone especially on the spectrum only shares a small percentage of similarity in symptoms.

      I used to know a lad [10 years old] many years ago who was ADHD who used to sleep a full night, but come 6am was wide awake until midnight seven days a week – had a very active school life in so far activity but because he could sleep a full night of six hours, the docs refused to award his parents medication – because he was full steam, he wore his parents out – medication is needed at times.

  5. If you had not had these so called diagnoses you might not have been such a great writer and poet.
    I have often observed that people with “disabilities” are much more intelligent than the average person without any problems.

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