Anger Within

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Anger Within

Quiet l am, quiet within, don’t see my face,
Yet outside l see those trying to push the pace,
But l linger, calm in my resolve,
Yet still they push, waiting for my pill to dissolve,
Push, push, push is all they can do,
Coaxing, prodding, pushing want to see the real you!
Anger within is hard to tease, and l am not yet in wrath mode,
Can take a lot before l finally explode,

People can be so damned annoying at times,
Up in your face, giving it all the lines,
Just want to see a little trace, they say,
To see that l feel emotionally,
Why push me to the damned brink?
Rage within if out will make you stop dead and think!
Perhaps it’s not best to push the anger within out,
Tensing l am, still they prod, still they shout!

Wanting me to show my true emotional colour,
They say, come on they shout, let’s see the power!
Mentally walking away, this is not worth it,
Yelling they are, upset that l am not combative,
Shoving, pushing, and pushing always do they push!
Eager to see me break, and release the black rush!
Knowing that l too have one, but keep it hidden,
Looking to sample the fruits of my anger, it is forbidden,

In my face, will not let it be, now come the taunts,
Punching me deep inside, spitefully painful comments,
Nay l will not be led like a horse to these waters,
Coaxed like a lamb for the table to the slaughter!
And they still ride the coaster from hell,
Resorting to shameful utterances from the shit well!
Why do some people insist on such cruel games?
Not happy with life, and finally resort to mental pain,
Onto another for the sake of the fact that they can,
Releasing their hostile aggressions in an abusive slam!
Wanting to make you share also within their damning misery!
Push, push, and push, coaxing, taunting, teasing, seriously,
Making you listen continually, up in your face!
Shouting, yelling, abusively hurling insults in disgrace,
That you do not bend nor bow to demands!
Or listen to the rage within that wants to command!

ENOUGH, my control is slipping and my anger is here,
Is this what you wanted –  to now cower in fear?
That you push me to the very limits of the rage!
Wrathful l am now, anger within out of its locked cage!
Rattled by your constant yelling’s of nothing,
Just to hear my anger within yell with the same sting?
Aggravated by your hostile intentions of wanting to fight,
Inconsiderately drawn it out just to see its bloody might!

Happiest are you when you push me beyond my control,
Gleeful in my pain, and jeer me when you see the blood boil!
Yet when l finally explode with a shattering impact,
Push no more do you, coax me not, and just back track!
Mentally my brain has reached its final seething point,
Why are you so upset? Is the rage, the anger within a disappointment?
And for what was this all for, so you could see that l had strength?
Responded l have, at your stupid pushing’s and now l am at arms length!

Listened have l to all the names under the sun,
That you have conjured up for what? FUN?
And now that you have seen the explosion from within,
Calm you are, thankful that my thick skin can weaken!
And now you walk away saying that you are misunderstood!
But you have ruined my day, which was otherwise good!

© Rory Matier 2015

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We have all met them during our travels, those that are not content with their lot, and seek to cause angst amongst others – l used to be bullied a lot when younger – l was different – didn’t run with the crowd, and so l was the subject to continued torment from my aggressors until l finally snapped and lashed out as l could take no more. You see this is the problem with bullies, eventually some of their victims do snap!! My philosophy is simple these days, “Don’t dish it out, if you can’t take it back!”

27 thoughts on “Anger Within

    1. Thank you Beckie, l have a new piece coming out tomorrow called The Lost Touch of Yesterdays – new style, new approach 🙂

      Took your advice and played a bit, just to make sure l still had it. In truth though, there is quite a bit of ‘new poetry’ scattered around. I have got some that is currently being reviewed and reworked – some is a bit … comicly bawdy, yes l think that’s the term lol!

  1. I have a very long fuse, but once the end is reached, it’s BAM💣💥and everyone runs for cover. This describes it so well!

    Looking forward to the comically bawdy works😜

  2. Lovely poem Rory, with me when I blow heaven and hell runs for cover and someone learns a very hard lesson not to pock the bear as they say. ❤️✌️

    BY FOR NOW

  3. OMG Rory. DO I recognise this!

    This might not be exactly what you are talking about, and I DO know what you are talking about, and strangely, it has happened to me much more now that I am blind and wheekchair bound. But when I was in my twenties. I had a little (well not so little really) brush with a guy who called himself a clinical theologian or something. I was introduced to him as someone who could help me. He came to my house, we met in my front room. He sat on the settee and got me to lie down on the floor. He told me to relate to him ANY thoughts that were coming into my head. Not likely, I thought. I stayed mum. He just could NOT get anything out of me. He said I had anger inside me. I stayed mum. This went on for an hour, with me getting angrier and angrier inside. He was so bloody spercilious. Saud he needed to royse the anger in me so we could examine it. Well, I wasn’t playing. In the end he left after an hour of silence from me. But just his attitude and hus probing of me made me SO angry I was fit to explode.

    Well, I hatched a plan. I knew where he luved. He was a vucar for God’s sake! I went to his house, in fury, meaning only to give him a piece of my mind. He invited me in. I sat there in his front room. He said something. I said something. Then……I WHACKED him on the side of his face with my handbag. His glasses fell off hus eyes and were cockeyed on his face. He looked SO stunned. “I could report you to the police for assault,” he said. Yeah! Well I did not set out to actually whack him one. But he sure DID raise a ger in me. Talk about playing with fure and getting burnt. Lol. Sorry Rory. Your poem is BRILLIANT.

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