Guilty As Sin



Perhaps some of the readership may have heard of a Party Card game by the name of ‘Cards Against Humanity?‘ Where upon players fill in the ‘blank spaces’ using words or phrases that society may deem offensive, inappropriate or a little risqué. This takes me back to the time l had an interesting conversation with my English teacher about how each and every one of us can be as guilty as sin when it comes to our dark mind. That each man, woman and child at one point or another in their lives will experience dark thoughts, and it is only the self-contained amongst us, that do NOT take them further.

Writers on murder and horror genres have to conjure up their dark imagination to allow them to write at times heinous crimes and ghastly deeds.  As a writer myself of/on a huge diverse spectrum, l find and found these conversations enlightening and they do make me think about how each of our minds can work at times. But equally ask someone who is suffering from depression, when the mind has broken – what on occasion their thoughts may be, it doesn’t make them evil or malignant – but our minds are complex and intricate and our imagination can at times run amok!

Guilty as Sin

Darkly erotic thoughts and ideas,
Run through most minds,
Daily like mental diarrhoea,
Rinsing the brain till it shines!

Yet, the controlled intellect,
Never allows those thoughts,
To turn into an actual suspect!
Some of course … do become overwrought,

With the passion of purest fantasy,
Dreams of audacious nerve,
Relishing in deepest depravity,
Desiring nightmares that disturb!

How many wish to kill,
To sample the throes of the dying,
Screams of death and misery set to thrill,
Those minds not designed for crying,

Wishing to wallow in pools of another’s blood,
Drained from some poor hapless soul,
Fascination of watching life turn to crud,
Knowing that thoughtlessness is within you, whole,

Of the sickened mind riddled with sin,
Craving such debauchery,
Taken from unwilling skin,
And consumed like a mere bloody Mary!

Perhaps your choice of sinful pleasure,
Runs along into deeper recesses,
Of your hidden and closed obscure,
Mind, where upon it’s fuelled by undress,

Of the flesh, mind and spirit,
Roaming abstract thoughts not allowed,
To show themselves or visit,
And remain darkly covered beneath a shroud,

Of your rawest excitement,
Where your hands move without slowing,
Over another’s body with malicious intent,
Taking what is not yours to own!

Oh yes, the greatest fears known to man,
Where they stumble mentally through the day,
Overwhelmed by emotions they fail to understand,
But manage to sustain under control and never display,

Are those that are lived by the others,
But never us, for we are more self-contained,
For we live alone by the code of druthers,
And as a general ruling have been ingrained,

Into what is morally right, and not what is wrong,
But l smile to myself now, a knowing smile,
If these thoughts were not here, not strong,
Then how do sane minds write such vile?

Convince ourselves we do,
Easily at times,
That we are simply not capable,
Of such a disturbing mind,

Pretence and denial the foulest sins,
Of humanity to date,
Yet mankind has been,
The biggest sinner of late,

Murdering, raping, gambling away,
Kidnapping, torturing, killing with glee,
Each and every day,
Ignoring the begging imploring plea!

Oh yes, we are all sadly as guilty as sin!
And don’t you forget it!

© Rory Matier 2013

37 thoughts on “Guilty As Sin

    1. Thanks GrumpyG – HYN 2018 to you my friend – we all have dark, dark and even darker minds at times. The trick and secret is to make it work for you in expression eh:)

  1. Love this! I struggled in the past when writing something especially dark. To think that I could “go there” was a bit frightening. But after coming to terms with it, I find it quite liberating! Nicely done!

  2. That picture… Yikes!! We all *do* have dark, depraved thoughts. I think to deny that we have them is a problem. As long as we don’t act on those thoughts, it’s all good.

    1. Hey Grandma, yes exactly – all of us DO have those thoughts at one point or another. It’s own own self control and moral conduct that ensures we don’t act on them.

      However, we both know the world is full of those who sadly do.

  3. This is a dark picture of man-kind! We indeed are guilty of a multitude of sins. And our indifference is the biggest sin of all. Keeping quiet and not saying a word.

        1. On rare occasions of course it can, but then a man can murder his wife or vice versa as examples and they may never have ever had such views. Swings and roundabouts l feel. There is theory that those on the Autism spectrum can lean more towards the murderous spree side, it’s not true … it’s people. People make up all sorts of percentages – remember all of us are guilty, children too 🙂

    1. I know, it’s a game that is close to the bone, but you are quite right sometimes players tend to think players might think they would do that – l love the shock aspect of it!! 🙂

      I remember playing the first ever game with friends and everyone one was looking at me , mutteri ng “Mm, must watch these no empthy type of the spectrum, they are just plain evil!!” It was all said in good jest, but l think some people were like, wow you made that decision easy!?

        1. Exactly!!!!! I’m finding i have less and less tolerance for these overly sensitive types. They just need to grow up. the world DOES NOT revolve around them.

        2. Yes, you are right it’s becoming difficult to navigate at times- especially writing wise . I sometimes find myself sitting down and thinking ‘this is good, read a piece through and then start thinking “mm, can l say that, will that upset someone, do l need a disclaimer and the list goes on … till you basically FFS Rory – it’s your story, this is what happened, it was ten/twenty/thirty years ago – it was your life back then, just do it!!”

          Shit happens, life happens, the world moves on.

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