Over the years, l have seen some really, seriously strange things. So these days l am more likely to believe in hauntings, spiritual misgivings, witchcraft, unnatural phenomena and so on, more so than deeply religious so called going ons. Each to their own. But my philosophy has always been the same, show me something so that my own eyes can see it, then l can make my own mind up.
Now, l have seen as said some very strange things and none of which have been what one might class as either traditional or conventional religion. I have never seen god, nor gods, but that’s not saying they don’t exist – it is simply saying l have never seen proof to make me believe in the existence – so who am l to say the belief in them is right or wrong?
People say ghosts don’t exist! Don’t they? Can you say with a hand upon your heart that they do or they don’t? No you probably can’t, whereas l can lean towards more of a yes, than a no. Whether these be a spiritual form or a negative energy or a memory, l think there is something there. I have a gift, l have had it since very young at least ten years of age, was perhaps the first real time l became aware of it. Ten was certainly the age, that my guide made his presence known to me, whilst by the age of 13/14 my guide was a regular visitor to me.
But this post isn’t a post about that, this is just another episode in Dear Blog and it is to do withthe current going ons in my household.
The term ‘bad juju’ is principally suggestive of a bad aura or a negative vibe, although some might decide to refer to it as a ‘haunting’. I have a sneaking suspicion that when Suze and l visited my father’s house and brought back some of his belongings, something came back with us. You may have read about the misfortunes with the Mini Cooper. Well whilst l write about that in a partial jest manner – on a more serious side, l do firmly believe that negativity came back to the house.
My father for twenty years lived a life he was unhappy with, with each passing year between 1998 – 2018 to the time he died in October, he was a very unhappy man. A man who didn’t move on and carried with him a deep regret and sorrow. Who was never truly happy and for many a time longed for his own death. My father when he was taken by the cancer in June of last year didn’t have long left on the planet. Just over four months from the official diagnosis he died from a very aggressive and progressive form of cancer. It most assuredly took him before he should have gone. He never believed he was ill until literally the last week of his life – he was never convinced he was going to die until the last week of his life!
He simply wasn’t ready nor prepared for the death that took him, so you could say that my father is now a restless soul, although others might say that his energy hasn’t yet departed.
I don’t know … but what l do know with absolute conviction is that my father is currently residing in some form or another in this house, even now as l type at 2.27am in the morning, l can feel his presence. The mere mention of his name albeit it mentally and l am awash with goosebumps and cold shivers. It’s not him, but a part of the negative energy.
There have been moments when l have seen him – briefly – l jest you not, not in the slightest. When l was staying at his house, and you may recall, l stayed there three times, l saw him once each time – sitting in the armchair supervising everything going on.
Suze who desperately would love to be more open than she is on that hidden level, struggles and yet she has felt the dark presence. I started to feel it when the pieces arrived here in the house from my father’s – the books, the photo albums, bits and bots and of course – the car. Of course l know there will be those amongst you who pooh pooh this notion – by all means go ahead – do so.
However this last weekend, Suze and l were working with determination to offload all of dad’s stuff – the stuff to be kept has been deeply saged, or washed – but the rest of the stuff has been saged and thrown away or shredded or donated away.
In the last few weeks, l have not been right, at all, more so than normal – of course l have a poor shoulder, l am losing sleep, l knowingly am suffering from sleep deprivation, but l know me, of all the people l do know well, l know ‘me’ extremely well. So l know when a part of me is being subjected to negativity.
Once everything is gone and out of here for good, l will deep sage the house again. There are a few darkened places in the house, shadows if you wish, cold spots. Scrappy has been on a few occasions watching something in the house with a head tilting interest and on a few occasions her hackles have risen.
We need to rid the house of my father’s darkened presence and the bad juju.