Dear Blog … 9.19 – 14/8/18


One of those days …

You ever have one of those days, when you start out with a list of things you want and wish to do, and yet come towards the end of the day you are still short? Well in truth my week is running like that, l am behind on so many posts l have wanted to make. I mean gee whizz it’s only Tuesday and l am already behind on things!

Sure it’s great that l have plenty to write about, from my point of view. But sadly life has a cruel way of getting in the way of desires at times.

I am struggling to believe that the other day simply reaching for the TV remote 4″ behind my arm of the armrest, and l have done so much damage to myself that l have been in a world of serious pain since!

My current tablets are simply not strong enough for the task at hand, and l am still having to go and see the doctors just to talk about a much stronger medication. How many times do l have to say to the medical profession that l am not fucking about here, l am in PAIN? Making matters worse and of course the atypical state of the NHS over here which has steadily been getting worse in the last five years alone, never mind all the years before that, that l cannot get an appointment with my doctor for nearly three weeks but and yet to just get an appointment to actually see a doctor, any doctor and l am having to ring up at 8am every morning to see if l may be able to get a cancellation appointment, because otherwise just to see ANY doctor is still a ten day wait, maybe if lucky.

Otherwise l am having to wait for the MRI, why? Why do l have to wait for the appointment for an MRI for someone to say, “Hey we think Mr Matier needs a much stronger and more directive pain killer?” Last week the specialist told me my doctors would receive a letter from him directing them to allow me to receive a stronger tablet so WHY am l having to go in to talk about it again?

I am so sick to the back teeth of having to take 10-12 tablets a day and sounding like a pair of damn maracas with a tablet that isn’t even actually doing the job!

I walk every day with Scrappy and Dodge and my right arm can’t even hold the lead, it has no power, l have numbness in my right hand as regular as clockwork and my arm doesn’t even swing anymore when l do walk, it just hangs there useless like piece of meat in an abattoir on a hook. I had to write a document today by hand – l mean hello we live in a digital fricking world, why by hand, and after just twenty five minutes l had to stop as my hand was trembling so much …

… and don’t even start me on the stomach cramps, bloat and constipation levels!! Ha ha lol!

Typing is at least marginally better than hand writing, because l am looking down and not moving a great deal. I no longer have the ability to look up and all day every day my neck, back, shoulder, arm and elbow are painful!

However l suppose looking for the positive out of the negative, sure l am behind on my posts, my personal schedule, but at least it means ‘l ain’t running out of material anytime soon.’

Just another one of those days …

Dear Blog ……


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