Dear Blog …10.27 – 10/7/18

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Grr, just grrrrrr – just get me off the planet!

So after all the so called drama llama ding dong of whether he had cancer or he didn’t have cancer – the all clear came through and so he didn’t have cancer and whether he was pleased or not pleased is anyone’s guess.That the hospital had somehow made a colossal error and that now everything was better.

Fine, over – yes?

NO!

Got a phone call off my father today, “Very sad tidings l am afraid, l received a call from the hospital today and they want to see me tomorrow to discuss my treatment plan with a view to start chemo!”

“What do you mean, start chemo l thought you had the ‘all clear’ and the hospital had somehow screwed up?”

“No, l misread the letter, l do have cancer.”

Now, l know that we all are guilty of misreading things at times, Suze did it the other day after appealing a parking fine, because although she bought two tickets to cover her parking in a lot, because there was a missing ‘1 minute’ between the tickets she was fined £60 – she appealed they replied and she thought ‘YAY!”, but after rereading it she discovered that they had read her appeal BUT 1 minute was still 1 minute, and so they ruled against her.

But l think there is a huge difference to reading a letter pertaining to whether you have cancer or not. If that was me, l would read the letter thoroughly, but it happens, so he misread the letter thought he was on all clear, rang everyone and said ‘Bad news l am not dying’, only to discover that he still had cancer. Don’t read this as me being flippant, l am not, but if you read the previous episode to Dear Blog, you would understand what l am talking about.

Making matters worse, during all of these weeks, dad has been cussing my sister and moaning that he couldn’t get hold of her, she was impossible to talk to, bloody text messages all the time, never calls back, been months since l have spoken to her, only sees me when she wants money … so on those premises you would think that my sister was not bothered?

I have tried to be understanding, l am sympathetic to his plight and l have tried much harder to stay in contact with him and talk to him and be a voice on the end of the phone. My sister has always been his favourite and my father/son relationship has been a struggle at times over the years. But l tried. My father has always pitted my sister against me, by manipulating and twisting things that have been supposedly said – when l knew damn well that he was just stirring once more. So much so, that truth be known, l don’t really know my sister and feel at times that our relationship could have been better had dad just let us be brother and sister on our own merits, rather than him trying to match us up against each other all the time.

After our phone call of this afternoon, l text my sister through FB [l don’t have any other way to communicate with her and we are not even friends in FB or anywhere for that matter] and asked if she would give dad a call, because the cancer hadn’t gone, hadn’t been cleared and that he had just misread the letter. She came back fairly quickly and said she was at work, but what did l mean, dad had misread the letter, he said it was all clear? Fair comment l figured.

But l said to my dad that l would ring him later in the day to see how he was faring which l did at six, he said he was okay just disappointed and angry. I asked if he had heard from my sister, and once more he moaned about her. During our phone call, l noticed a notification had come up in FB and that my sister had sent another message. Dad said he would ring me after tomorrow’s hospital appointment and so after the call ended l read what my sister had written

“Well admittedly when l saw him on Sunday, l thought he had lost a lot of weight?”

Wait a moment l thought, what does that mean? it’s only Tuesday now? She had seen dad on the Sunday as in 2 days ago?? Was she lying?

I rang my dad back and asked if he had seen her on Sunday?

“Yes, why?”

“But you said literally only a few hours ago you hadn’t seen or heard from her in months?”

“Err, well um yes, well l didn’t quite mean months, look l am ill Rory, l forget these things, got to go, speak to you tomorrow.”

Grr FFS, once more played by him!

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Yesterday l sold my gamer’s chair, Suze and l agreed that perhaps this may not be conducive to a healthy back, and so today l have been using a straight backed dinner chair with a pillow behind my back to sit on whilst writing, and as it happens it is more painful than my gamer’s chair which is typical.  Although currently l am sitting on Suze’s office swivel chair which is not much better.

The gamer’s chair above [now sold] had been moved out of my office and into hers whilst l used the dining table chair during the day and when she gets back from work we swap over the straight back for her swivel. So l figured l would help move the chairs, and forgot to use my good arm, the left and used my right, therefore instantly causing me to yelp and curse myself for my own stupidity when my darling partner suddenly said, “Why are you such a burk? All day l listen to imbecility on the phones the last place l expect to see it is from you!”

“I was just trying to help.”

“Oh right, and how’s that working for you then – is there any way l can simply get off this planet?” She snided at me with the infamous Suze Stare! “Muppet!!”

Mm, this may not have been a good move ….

I feel, l will have to deliver the second part to the Animals by Accident post tomorrow, and being the muppet l am, my arm is now caning me more from trying to be helpful than it was when simply writing lol!

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Muppet!!!!

Dear Blog ……

4 thoughts on “Dear Blog …10.27 – 10/7/18

Add yours

    1. Hey Ang,

      Yeah, don’t get me wrong, l am sympathetic to him, but instead of him still playing silly buggers about my sister not seeing him, if he just acknowledged and accepted that we do what we can when we can, he would find everything is smoother, but due to his stirrings the ravine between my sister and my friendship with her has become very strained. But also it just makes it harder to actually try to remain trusting of what he says.

      He has always been this way even since we were kids.

      It’s hard.

      Hope you are keeping well 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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