Dear Blog … 11.45 – 04/7/18


Good grief, whatever next?

Well it’s now a somewhat regular routine, that l am retiring for the night between 10pm and 11pm, l simply don’t have the energy to go to bed any later and by that time of the night despite tablets, the pain is just eating away at any reserves l may have left. I then proceed to have a restless night waking up momentarily several times and then around 6am l am stirring to rise and by 6.15 am l am back out of bed.

I made the foolish error last night of not taking any tablets what so ever and regretted it this morning, awakening with even more pain than before, and my right arm refusing to work properly for a good half hour afterwards.

But l feel l am stuck between a rock and a hard place at present, without the right medication l am having to rely upon a mixture, one either floors me into zombie status or one makes me constipated whilst the last has the reverse effect. None are great at hitting the pain at any level of success.

But truth be known l am sick to the back teeth of shoving fucking chemicals down my throat! We should not be so bloody reliant on the chemical giants who are making billions off our own misery and in truth if not for those bastards in the first place flooding the environment with chemicals we wouldn’t need chemicals to combat it! Chemicals and a chemical reliant global society is NOT the answer, we need to be investigating and trialling more on organic results. There are alternatives, alas however all we are facing is resistance from many industry’s at the introductions of an alternative pathway.

Doctors over here are thoroughly encouraged and motivated to simply pump more and more anti-depressants into the society, really urged to do so as the quick fix , the ultimate answer and so more and more people than ever before in history are now being slowly zombified by even more chemicals, when will it end?

I am not saying that the world is not a nice place, but wise up, the world has never been a nice place! Don’t even start me on the food chain, that has more damaging chemicals in it that it simply doesn’t need also!

Oh well off my soap box!



Last night l went to bed and Scrappy came in and lay down by my side, instead of sleeping in her bed at the end of the bed. Which was nice, although she is on my right side, so l couldn’t really stroke her that much without adding more pain at a time when l needed to be cuddling into my hot water bottle. But not long after switching out the light, l suddenly hear ‘pfuff, pfuff, perrruff-ff-ff!’ followed by the most disgusting smell on the planet, she repeated this activity for a full two minutes – great, the joys of raw meat diet farting!

Suze who was still up and working on her computer a couple of rooms across was laughing, but trying to stifle those laughs….. as one does.

“Anything wrong darling?”

“Like you don’t know?”

“Well you have had a similiar day sweetheart, it was hard to tell the difference!”

I had to contend myself with listening to Scrappy’s belly gurgling for the next 10 minutes before thankfully slumber took me!



I shouldn’t laugh, but Scrappy this morning at 5 am, left my room, opened the door and went into Suze’s room and woke her up, which is one of Scrappy’s regular routines when saying good morning to ‘Mummy’ and then coming back and getting into her own bed and sleeping until 7am!

Ho, ho, ho!


Last night l took some photo’s of a flowering plant we have in our garden and some butterfly/moths that have taken to its presence. Anyone know what species they are?





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