Three Seasons Bachelor Man.
It’s hard to say,
l am an atypically stereotyped bachelor man?
Perhaps l am?
l am single, and live in a forty-foot caravan!!
Previous to my current relationship which began in 2013, my last one ended in 2009 and it was a right jalopy of one disaster after another. It was a case of two people who got together for the wrong reasons – l know for many you quite possibly can relate.
My partner and l this year will have been together for five years. We have had our fair share of challenges and obstacles like most solid relationships, and we have got through them. But l am wiser now, and more aware of who l am supposed to be. A strange thing to say perhaps, but these days l know l am actually autistic with my autism, because of my Asperger’s syndrome. I received my diagnosis in 2008, and it caused such upheaval that it shook the very foundations of an already unstable relationship back then, and shook it so hard, that two people broke up – and l have no regrets of that failing or falling down – it is simply part and parcel of the learning curve we face during our life.
However combined with that diagnosis and the falling down of the relationship, was l able to seriously look into my life, my loves and my over all philosophy of who l was supposed to be, and more importantly – where did l fit into my future?
You will have read before in my writing that l lived in a forty foot caravan – well in truth it was more of a run down mobile home, a static caravan. Forty two feet in length, twelve feet wide; kitchenette/diner, bathroom, two bedrooms and a lounge room and windows everywhere!
It wasn’t ideal as a living space, but it did serve a purpose. The isolation due to location as in on the Lincolnshire Fens, provided a back drop of peacefulness and serenity and l WAS able to really start to rediscover myself and come to grips and terms with what that particular diagnosis meant for me as a person.
There were many things crashing around in my head between the years of 2009 – 2011 specifically and it was at best description a tough time. 2011, was the toughest and the year which held the most elation – as in almost spiritual sense, l felt l experienced an awakening. It wasn’t the first and it wasn’t the last, my last was October just gone, and no doubt l will experience more till my dying day.
Some people never experience them, and that is quite sad in truth – but l do and will always be grateful for those moments of clarity.
One of the realisations was that IF l was to be involved in a relationship ever again and not have disaster befall me of my own naïve making [in so far as not knowing who l was] then my new partner would have to know me inside out. My new partner does … sometimes scarily so!
But this poem was written in 2011 – the year of the awakening. …
Three Seasons Bachelor Man.
Now l acknowledge not all from the convent of bachelor hood,
Live this way, some have houses or apartments of brick and wood!
But my humble abode is made up of metal and hard plastic,
Fitting in with my lifestyle, which is best described as erratic!
No longer do l have a woman in my life, this is true,
I have two dogs, superb companions so l am rarely blue…
Although they do lack … somewhat in the ‘conversational department’,
The bliss they award from not being able to talk although at times is heaven sent!
Women are fine when they are great, but ‘GOD’ are terrible when rotten,
Living with a woman like this as an experience is never easily forgotten!
Nay, l am not saying l am the completely perfect man at all,
Have my quirks and oddities, and am still on the explore,
For discovering my true inner being, and whether l am supposed to be,
Sharing my time with another, or living my life out as just me?
Love women as a species, l can honestly say this is true,
But are we really meant to be together always as a ‘me and you?’
To boot …
l am an Aspergian, making me an awkward proposition,
For any new lover to take on board that composition!
With the quality’s l possess, taking me away from the rest of the crowd,
Solitary living perhaps is the only way of life l should enshroud?
Boredom l don’t seem to suffer from, nor do l ever get lonely,
Largest flaw l do have is trying to make this forty footer homely!
It can be an idyllic way of living, albeit winters are brutally cold,
Takes a certain type of person to live this way, and they must be bold!
But the summers and springs that follow the igloo way of life,
Makes up for the troubles and freezing points of winters’ strife!
I would like to say that we have beautiful autumns here,
Alas we only enjoy three seasons on the Shire Fens’ year!
Of the monthly allocation of seasonal blessings, we see three,
Spring is three, summer is also three, but six for our extended wintry!
Perhaps l have noticed this more as an isolated bachelor,
I used to enjoy more seasons in a given year, not now, not four!
Three is the best l can hope to enjoy and to see,
And this might be why, l am not succeeding romantically!
Autumn is apparently the most loved season of the year,
If true romance is to be discovered, it will be found here!
But to be truthful, l am none too bothered by the equation,
Not ready yet, for another troublesome loving relation!
Furthermore, being as isolated from the rest of society as l am…
For the time being …
… content am l in my role as the three seasons bachelor man.
Guy or Bloke, Your Choice